What the fuck!!!!

I now truly believe in horoscopes. Every horoscope freak out there knows that Scorpios (like myself) are highly compatible with Pisces and Aries. JESSICA'S A DAMN ARIES!!!!!

Every girlfriend I've EVER HAD is one of those two signs, I shit you not. Anybody out there reading this, horoscopes are completely real, accurate, and based completly on concrete scientific fact.

I just pulled my dick out. That's how strongly I believe in horoscopes.

AND I'M OUT LIKE YOUR DAUGHTER'S POON WHEN DAVE, THE PEDOPHILE OF DISASTER SHOWS UP!!!!!!