Fuckin' bullshit!!!!

You may remember a few posts ago when I said a 29 year old bitch was hitting on me. She hasn't stopped. I told her that I have a girlfriend, and even though we aren't doing the best, I'm not going to fuckin' cheat on her. She keeps on bugging me! She fuckin' called work and asked me to meet her somewhere so we can talk as friends. I wish some people could take a hint. Naw, fuck that, I wish some people could take me saying to them in their face that it's not going to happen.

Oh yeah, Cryptic Collection 3 kicks ass. Pick that shit up. Normally I don't feel a Twiztid album on every single track, but on this one I do. It's the shit.

Let's see, how about I pull that book out again? You know, that one "If" book.

"If you could have one wish, what would it be?"

That's a tough one. I could wish for a lot. I don't wanna wish for something stale though, like world peace. This place wouldn't be any fun! Maybe I could wish for all of superman's powers. Or the morphing thing!!! I could morph and shit, that would be fresh, right? Hey, I know! I would wish to have any superpower I could think of at any time! Yeah, if I wanted a superpower, it would just be there! And I could turn it off at any time too. Fresh.

"If you could say anything to the current pope, what would it be?"

Fuck all that. I don't consider the pope to be some sort of holy figure, he's just like any other human. That's like pastors and reverends and shit, people all of a sudden straighten up around them, like these people are holier than they are, like they have an inside track with God. Nobody is holier than another, pope or not. Besides, the pope rolls around in that bulletproof popemobile of his; why does he do that? I mean, is he scared that if he gets killed he'll go to heaven or something? You know we're all fucked when the pope is afraid to die.

Anyway, to answer the question, if I could say something to the pope, I would lean down to him, right next to his ear and I would say...

"You smell funny."

There you go. After that, I'd have a fresh story that I could tell for the rest of my life, and then I'd show everybody the rings I stole off his fingers! WOOOOOO!