DICKHOLE ALERT! IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ MY INNERMOST THOUGHTS, STOP NOW!

So, let's count 'em up...

1. Tonya Elaine Whitlock
2. Amanda Carrie Fix
3. Ann Catherine Gross
4. Lacey K Ferrell
5. Meghan Marie Bottenfield
6. Susanah Lynn Traxler
7. Jessica Ashley Humphreys

I like to play around with people and tell them these are the names of the women I've had sex with, but actually these are the women who I've loved in my life. When I get married, every woman who has heard "I love you" from me will get their name tatooed on my left shoulder. Each one still has a piece of my heart, that love never really goes away completely; so I figure I should symbolize that in a tatoo. The names in the large type are the major ones, the ones that aren't are rebounds. Boy, I'm a rebounding motherfucker, ain't I?

I broke up with Jess. I guess she figured yesterday would be the best time to take some time off from our relationship and not call or anything, seeing as how we're doing so amazingly well. (SARCASM.) Look, I don't mean to sound like an asshole, but I have no patience left. I thought I made it clear that I needed attention. I guess I didn't make myself clear enough.

I went to Matt's, something just told me to have a look, and there they all were. Sleeping. Went in, talked to Jessica, (even in the dark she's beautiful) and told her I was breaking this off, and that I would be by her place later today to pick up my shit.

You don't have to worry about not talking to your whiny boyfriend or calling him to let him know you care anymore. Have a good time.

Why would she ask me not to break up with her, then still slack off? I'm so upset, pissed off, sad, mad. Sucks.

Well Jess, it took you all of a month to earn a spot on my body and in my heart. Congratulations.